A few definations that I came across while reading my company's intranet site:
Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and fool on the other.
Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through the minds of either.
Conference: the confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Compromise: The art of dividing the cake in such a way that everyone believes that he has got the biggest piece.
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by Feminine waterpower.......
Conference Room: A place where everyone talks ,nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on....
Office: A place where you can relax after your home life.
Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit and decide nothing can be done together.
Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
Opportunist: A person who starts taking a bath if he accidently falls into the river.
Father: A banker provided by nature.
Criminal: A guy who is no different from the rest, except that he is caught.
Politician: A person who shakes your hand befor elections, and confidence after.
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